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Interviews By Shuuichi Minamino Part 1-4 by Cherrie
part 1	part 2	part 3	part 4	part 5
Part 1
Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino Notes and Disclaimers: Che-chan here, again with a new gag series to go with another more serious on-going fanfic. Hopefully, this fic would tickle a few funny bones for a few minutes. Let's just say that I need something to ease me somehow. Hunter X Hunter and Yu Yu Hakusho are both owned by Mr. Yoshihiro Togashi. Though the content of these interviews are based on the anime, not all reflect the truth. There are times when the characters will be twisted. Beware of possible spoilers from time to time. YYH Characters included: Kurama / Shuuichi Minamino - an extremely famous (both in the anime and out) character. He was once an infamous youkai (demon) thief with just as much charisma as his human alter-ego. He is mostly nice and friendly, so long as one would not trigger his temper. He can be pretty deadly if pushed too far. Koenma - the prince of Reikai (Spirit World). Usually seen as this loud, annoying kid, the only consolation one can get from him is that he IS quite comical, and he has an extremely good-looking teenaged form worth drooling for. He can be pretty responsible and business-minded if needed. Episode 1 - Gon Freeces A strangely short, very young boy stood majestically (despite his size) on the director’s seat. He wore what seems to be a simple plain blue Chinese style clothing, a big hat the size of his head resting atop his short brown hair. His eyes seem to be almost closed because of the narrowness, and to make his whimsical appearance complete, a blue pacifier rested between his child’s lips. The boy held up his hand. The lights around the studio flashed abruptly at the simple signal, focusing specifically on a certain spot on the stage. The momentarily busy audience has now grown quiet, silent murmurs rising from time to time, different fingers pointing at the stage, some in amusement, some in impatience. Various crewmembers started to run to the positions assigned to them, avoiding the red-lighted cameras on their way. A lively music came up to blare around the studio’s surroundings, the voice of an announcer rising up as the single sound that stands off the most. "Welcome to our exclusive interviews of the most beloved characters of Hunter X Hunter! For further details, here’s your host--the Romantic Soldier himself-- Mr. Shuuichi Minamino!” Huge bursts of applause and feminine squeals erupted from the audience as a tall figure of a long-haired man emerged from one side of the stage. The man’s almost feminine face looked very young, probably in his late teens, with flaming red hair cascading behind his back and shoulders, his charming emerald eyes catching every audience member, making most of the women sigh in a dream-like state. Seeing that everybody’s eyes were on him, Shuuichi Minamino flashed his most charming smile as of late. As supposed to be expected, half the female population and a few of the young and new crewmembers who still aren’t used to the host’s playfulness, fainted right on the spot. But fortunately, due to circumstances that have happened ever since the history of the show, a group of paramedics went to the scene to aid the “victims”. Used to such reactions, Shuuichi Minamino proceeded. “Welcome everyone! This is Shuuichi Minamino--” The young man was forced to stop his introduction due to the insistent screams the other stronger half of the audience gave out. “Thank you,” he bade them good-naturedly, and continued. “Again, I am Shuuichi Minamino, more commonly known as Kurama of Yu Yu Hakusho.” Again, a series of screams, and the constant shouts of “Marry me!” sounded from the audience. Shuuichi had to stop yet again. “Cut!” the director yelled out. His voice was drowned by the women’s voices, but he held up his hand high enough for everyone to see. The cameras immediately stopped rolling. The young boy with the bossy voice jumped up to stand on his seat and faced the audience. “Minna,” he addressed them. “I know Mr. Minamino is very famous among you all, but can we please suppress our emotions for the moment?” he asked in a patient tone, even if deep in his mind, he was full of annoyance and regret. 'I knew I should’ve gotten Kazuma instead,' he thought to himself, thinking that the less than famous, orange-haired man as a host would be less chaotic. Once the audience has settled down, the cameras started rolling again. The flushing, slightly embarrassed host stood in his usual place, flashing the camera yet another smile. “As I was saying, I will be your host for tonight’s show. For our first interview, may we please bring out...Mr. Gon Freeces!” The lively music sounded again, and a [now] decent applause was offered as a small boy of twelve came up the stage, a smile brighter than the sun, moon and comets combined shining through his innocent, child-like face. His dark mass of hair was standing up on a very familiar style, and his clothes were composed of a semi-formal, blue checkered shirt and black pants. Kurama gestured for them to sit down on the chairs provided for them both. Seeing the other man’s friendly smile, Gon’s smile widened (it WAS possible). “Hi!” he greeted the other enthusiastically. Kurama instantly decided that he liked the kid. “Hello,” he greeted back, with as much enthusiasm as the other gave out. Well, maybe half the boy’s enthusiasm anyway. That much perkiness in his voice may lose him his charm, and he didn’t want that. “I was told that I shouldn’t mistake my host for a girl. At first, I was confused, but now I know what the people backstage mean,” Gon said, slightly amused. He turned on his seat and waved at the shadows on the side of the stage from which he had come from. “Thank you everyone! You’ve been very nice to me during my stay!” Kurama could only blink as Gon was met by several uneasy waves back. Being that he’s had many comments about his looks being more like a girl’s, he let the innocent boy pass. But what he couldn’t believe was how the other seemed to be talking to the crewmembers, his voice audible in the stage microphones. They all know that once on stage, people must act as if the world around them does not exist. Apparently, Gon had just broken one of the sacred rules. “Uhm, Gon-kun,” he started, in attempts to gain the boy’s attention back. Gon finally stopped his waving and turned back to him. “We should start the interview now, don’t you think?” “Hai!” replied the boy. “Okay,” chuckled the red-haired host. “Now, you’ve become a Hunter at such a young age. Is there anything you would like to say about that?” Gon grinned. “That’s because I’ve had a lot of help from my friends!” At this, the young boy turned to the camera. “Hi, Killua! Hi, Leorio! Hi, Kurapika! You guys are the best!” he exclaimed happily, waving frantically at the camera. Shaking his head in amusement, Kurama just proceeded on getting his job done. “For those who haven’t been informed, a Hunter is a title used in an alternate world Togashi-sama, me and Mr. Freeces' wonderful creator, conjured up in his latest manga. Hunters are given special privileges, and are regarded as most probably the more highly ranked people in their world. But to become one, an applicant must go through a series of extremely difficult tests to prove his worthiness,” he explained. He turned to Gon for confirmation, to which the other was happy to agree on. “Your reason for becoming a Hunter was to find your father. During the course of the Hunter Exam, I’ve noticed that you were more than determined to pass it, and often you say that it was because of your father. Why is that?” “You see, my father is a very famous and strong Hunter,” Gon replied, now turning serious. “And at that time, I told myself that if I wasn’t strong enough to become what he was, I am not worthy to see him.” “I see that you’re very determined and goal-oriented at such a young age,” commented Kurama. “But tell us, though. After the exam, you didn’t go straight to your father, did you?” “Nope,” said the other. “I was off to find Killua.” “And Killua-san is...?” “My best friend!” exclaimed Gon happily, and again, he stood up and faced the camera. “Killua!” he bade, waving a frantic hand again. “Er...okay,” muttered the young host, uneasily pulling Gon by the sleeves and ushering him back to his seat. “And why did you temporarily set your foremost reason aside for this ‘Killua’?” “Because Killua’s brother is a bastard!” said the boy vehemently, a frown marring his supposedly cheerful face. Kurama blinked. “Excuse me?” “Illumi Zoldick,” Gon promptly said. “He’s the coldest, meanest, most arrogant and manipulative man I’ve ever met!” * * * * * “Aah-choo!” The trembling old man who was cowering under the table stole a glance at his would-be murderer. The pale, raven-haired young man with the calm face, also the one who was just momentarily threatening his life, now blinked, surprised at his own actions. “Damn,” the young one muttered to himself. “I should stop sleeping out in the open next time.” He glanced at the old man under the table, who now went back to the rolled-up coward that he was a few seconds ago. Not that he could blame him. He has that kind of effect on people after all. Gracing the man with his infamous, emotionless gaze, Illumi spoke, one hand that was nonchalantly clutching three humongous needles extended. “Do you have a tissue?” * * * * * "Okay, Gon-kun. What made you say such...harsh words towards somebody?" "Because it's true!" Gon said, his face determined. "He played with Killua's mind and made him kill Bodoro-san. Bodoro-san is one of the applicants in the Hunter Exam. He's now dead because of Illumi." "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought that it was Killua who killed him?" asked Kurama. "Well, yeah, but he didn't mean it," defended Gon, his frown still tainting his innocent face. "Killua's brother said some very bad words to him and made him quit the Exam." "Ah...I see," muttered Kurama, scratching his head. He glanced at the screen beside the camera that flashed the questions he was supposed to ask, not understanding much about the boy's emotional outburst. He cleared his throat, shifting his eyes back to Gon. "This may be an improper question to ask a boy your age, but our scriptwriter seems to insist." "It's okay, you can ask me anything, Kurama-san," said Gon, his cheerful smile back in place. Kurama nodded. "Have you ever heard of yaoi?" he asked carefully. Gon merely blinked. "Yaw...what?" "Uhm, yaoi," Kurama said uneasily. "It is a term used for...er..." An uneasy laugh. "Gon-kun, have you ever read any romance novels?" "Eew!" exclaimed the boy. "You mean like those books Mito-san reads where these people do some kissing and cuddling?" "I...think that's it," Kurama said, nodding. "I take it you don't like those things?" "What are you talking about? I'm a kid! Aunt Mito said I shouldn't be reading those things," said Gon. "I...uh, understand..." Kurama then looked over his shoulder to catch the eye of a young girl's shadow behind the darkness of the side stage. The girl waved innocently, and ushered him to go on. Kurama looked at her incredulously, but the girl insisted, waving a frantic hand towards him to go on with the show. "So, I guess you don't know much about yaoi or shounen ai?" "Huh?" Gon blinked. "I don't get what you're saying." The red-haired host sighed, knowing that he should be careful with his words lest some people start barraging him with rotten vegetables because he was "soiling" the kid's mind. 'Stupid script', he muttered to himself. "You see, Gon, in the world of anime, it's very prominent to find fans who are very much inclined to shounen ai. It's...er, it has something to do with two males. Do you understand?" "Two males. Okay." Gon nodded. "And being that your friendship with Killua seems to be most sweet and obvious in the show, some people think that you look good together." Gon blinked. "Really?" Kurama frowned. "Uh...yeah, really." A slight pause ensued between them. By the looked of utter surprise and confusion in Gon's eyes, Kurama almost wished that he hadn't said those words. Seconds ticked by, but still the silence deafened him. Until... "WOW!" exclaimed Gon. As if it had grown into a habit, he faced the camera again. "Killua! Did you here that? He said that we look good together!" "Gon," Kurama called, waving his hand in front of the boy. "Do you understand what I'm trying to tell you?" "Yes!" replied Gon happily. "That me and Killua look good together!" "No. I mean...yes, that's it, but it's---er, not the way you think." "What do you mean? Killua and I aren't good together after all?" "No, no, that's not it. 'Look good together' doesn't exactly pertain to mere friendship. Some people connect it with love and...well, that's where 'shounen ai' comes from, love between two guys. Do you understand?" Gon stared at him for a while. "But I DO love Killua! He's my best friend!" Kurama fainted on the spot. * * * * * In some nearby hotel room, three distinct figures were huddled up on the foot of the bed, facing the television. All three heads were graced by huge sweatdrops, glum eyes staring back at the glaring screen. "I pity that host," mumbled the tallest one, scratching his head. "What the hell's with Gon and his ignorance anyway!?" "Leorio, for once, I agree with you," said the blonde-haired one beside the other. He then turned his head to the youngest of them, taking note of the boy's just as exasperated stare. "Killua, what do you have to say about this?" The white-haired boy's face was graced by a small blush. He knew what the host was talking about of course, he just wondered why his best friend still does not get it. He turned away, refusing to catch the blonde's gaze. "Since when did Gon start saying intelligent things anyway?" * * * * * "Kurama-san? Kurama-san, are you all right?" Emerald green eyes opened wearily at the sound of that insistent call. A small hand was waving itself in front of his eyes, catching his attention. A low groan erupted from the man's throat, a steady hand clutching his head. "You fell on the floor. Are you okay?" asked Gon, his eyes very much worried. Everything dawned on Kurama again. The interview, the boy's constant misunderstandings... He turned his head towards the shadows again, glaring at the silhouetted figure of the show's scriptwriter. 'To hell with the script!' he told himself as he pulled himself up. "I'm fine," he said, reassuring the young boy. He smiled at him uneasily, far too busy with himself to notice the huge crowd (mostly worried and frantic females) that the director and the crew were trying to hold down. "Forget the last question, okay? Let's just settle that you and Killua are very good friends." "Okay!" the young boy grinned. "To move on, let's go to the next segment of our show. We have especially chosen a few lucky audience members who would like to say a few words to you. Will that be okay with you, Gon?" "Of course!" "Right," Kurama stood up and gestured to the microphone on the middle aisle of the audience seats. "May the first audience member step up please?" Upon saying this, a middle-aged woman with joyous, tearful eyes stood up and dashed towards the microphone. "Gon-chan," she began, clutching the microphone as if she was holding on for dear life. She was looking at Gon lovingly, like the way a mother would look at her long lost child. "I've seen how much of a good boy you are, Gon-chan. Would you do a poor old woman a favor and be my son?" * * * * * "What!?" Obaasan let out a small laugh, her gaze shifting to the enraged woman beside her. "Calm down, Mito, it's a very innocent question," she said, an amused smile still fixed on her peaceful face. "But mother!" retorted Mito, a shaky finger pointing at the TV. "Who does that woman think she is!? Gon!" she now glared at the screen. "You dare make a wrong move, and I won't do your laundry for a month!" * * * * * "Er...ehe?" Gon scratched his head. For some miraculous miracle, the nice old lady was now clutching on to his ankle, not in the least bit letting go no matter how much he tried to shake her away. "Uh, ma'am, would you mind letting Mr. Freeces go? We have a show to do," pleaded Kurama, tapping the woman lightly on the shoulder. "No!!! But I want him as a son! I've lived a lonely life for eternity! I just want someone like Mr. Gon to take care of me!" wailed the hysterical lady, shaking her head vigorously to make Kurama let go of her. "Mito-san's going to kill me..." mumbled Gon uneasily, still trying to pry away from the...er, nice old lady's hold. "Madam, please!" pleaded Kurama again, now trying to pull the lady's arms away from his interviewee. But his attempts were in vain, the lady's grip was as strong as steel. 'Good gods! I've battled the largest of demons but I can't even pull this woman away?' For a moment, he wondered if this woman was human... "Oh!" the woman exclaimed, her wide eyes widening all the more at the mere recognition of the host's face. "You're Kurama! Minamino! Oh, I've seen you too! You're the one who risked his life to save his human mother! Ooooohhh, that was one of the most tear-jerking moments I've seen in my life! You are such a good boy!" ranted the woman, clutching onto Kurama this time, patting his head enthusiastically. "I want YOU to be my son too!" * * * * * Shiori Minamino suddenly choked on the tea she was drinking upon hearing the woman's statement. A series of continuous coughs erupted from her frail body, her breathing shortened by the shock. "Honey, are you all right?" asked a very concerned Hatanaka, Shiori's new husband, Kurama's stepfather. He reached out to rub his wife's back to ease her from the coughs. Alas, Shiori was too much into choking to give him an audible reply. Shuuichi Hatanaka, Kurama's stepbrother, grinned playfully. "Oohh...Shuu-ani's in trou-ble!" * * * * * "OUT! Get that psychotic lady out of my show, NOW!" Kurama and Gon watched idly as various crewmembers carried the wailing woman out of the stage upon the director's order, half relieved, half feeling sorry, being that theirs were two of the kindest hearts to ever exist. "So much for our time," said Kurama, his eyes now on the golden wrist watch he was wearing. He turned to Gon and smiled at him. "Thank you so much for your time, Gon-kun, it was really nice meeting you," he said, his smile ever so warm and friendly. "It's nice to meet you too, Kurama-san!" bade the cheerful boy. Kurama now faced the audience. "That's all for tonight! I speak in behalf of our show as I bid you goodbye. For tomorrow night's interview, please watch out for none other than Gon-kun's friend, Killua Zoldick!" Applause and the momentary squeals that can't seem to be held any longer. Then... "WAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! Gon! Shuuichi! Any of you two will do! My SONS!!!" The director has had enough. "That's it. I'm gonna MURDER that woman!!!" Gon was now searching for shelter behind a safe chair. Kurama though, made a dash for the small director, pulling him back from running over to the hysterical woman. "No, Koenma, stop! Control yourself! You're the prince of Reikai, for goodness's sake!" "Oh, that's right!" Still enraged, Koenma turned to the camera. "Jorju! Hit that crazy woman's life file with the death stamp, now!" "No, Jorju, don't!" "You DARE alter the command of THE god of death, Kurama!?" "Ahaha...of course not, Koenma-sama," said Kurama uneasily, but still held Koenma's frantic child's body above the floor, ushering the crew to take the woman away in attempts to save her life. He faced the audience again, flashing them his most beautiful smile, planning to shift their attention from Koenma's act of murder to himself. The plan worked. Several screams erupted from the females of the audience. Half of the remaining half of the original number now fainted as well, and at least one quarter of the men's population have now converted to the...er, other side, and were also cheering for Kurama as well. The remaining parts of the audience who were left sane, were either old ladies or men with very strong possession of testosterone. Not that all of them were still all right. A very small fraction of them now saw Kurama beautiful, and were in the midst of doing a sick petition to convert his...er, gender. Fortunately, the host was oblivious to these schemes, and just went on cheerfully. "I hope everybody enjoyed tonight's show. Again, this your ever devoted host, Kurama, wishing you all good night! Take care everyone!" And at that, Kurama exited, taking Gon's hand on his free one while the other was busy holding Koenma's short body on his side. The loud lady was finally given tranquilizer and was now sleeping soundly, while the remaining crewmembers were calling more paramedics to aid the audience's hysterical state. The men who were supposedly on rounds to get more signatures signed in their petition were abducted by the local hospital for mental health, and were currently being drove back to their place to ease them off their absurd fixation. Definitely, all was well, except for the heavy decrease in the expected audience members for the next show. The cheesy, cheerful music that served as the show's theme song sounded again, and the cameras finally went blank. End of Episode 1
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Part 2
Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino Notes and Disclaimers: I just noticed something in my fanfics...I suck in doing titles ^_^ Hahaha! =P Anyway, Hunter X Hunter and Yu Yu Hakusho are both owned by Mr. Yoshihiro Togashi. Though the content of these interviews are based on the anime, not all reflect the truth. There are times when the characters will be twisted. Beware of possible spoilers from time to time. YYH Characters / Terminologies mentioned: Shuuichi Minamino - see chapter 1. Koenma Daioh - see chapter 1. Hiei Jaganshi - Kurama's best friend. Not exactly gifted with height, but is good with other things. He has the best speed among all the main characters of YYH. His temper is also as quick as his body, and will blow up at a single comment. He is said to be Killua's counterpart. Jaou Ensatsu Kokuryuuha - this is what Hiei yells whenever he summons the kokuuryuuha, his black dragon. He keeps this dragon in his right arm, protected by a bandage. Episode 2 - Killua Zoldick "Good evening everyone!" greeted a cheerful host as he stood in front of a more quiet audience. Outside, one will be able to see the strict sign that clearly states "No Kurama fans!" in very thick, very red letters, underlined twice for more emphasis...as if it needed any more. Care of a nifty Reikai gadget, the director and his minions...er, staff, were able to check whether or not the incoming audience-to-be were safe or not. Kurama was somehow relieved. Though he has learned how to be comfortable with his fans over the years, he still didn't like the idea of people hyperventilating and losing their sanity because of him. Besides, the peace and quiet was rather nice for a change. "As I have mentioned last night, we will have yet another special guest here with us," he said, his smile still intact. "Let us all welcome...Mr. Killua Zoldick!" Several squeals were heard from all sides of the audience seats. As if they've already learned their lesson from last time, the crew immediately ran to the scene to check whether their "anti - Kurama fan" gadgets were working. But alas, they weren't screaming for Kurama. The screaming was directed for someone else. "Yo," greeted a pale, white-haired young boy on the stage. He was wearing a loose white shirt with a few red and yellow parts tracing the sleeves and the area around the neck. His blue jeans were loose, scrunching together on his ankles, atop black and white sneakers. Upon hearing the boy's voice, more squeals were heard. Several banners that said "The Official Killua Fan Club", "The REAL Killua Fan Club", "The First Killua Fan Club", "The Best Killua Fan Club", and so on and so forth--all claiming their possessive titles--were held up. It didn't seem to matter that Killua was years younger than most of the fans. They all looked ready to jump and kiss the floor he was standing on even if the world froze over. "It seems as though Mr. Zoldick is quite famous among our audience tonight," commented Kurama with his usual smile. He then gestured Killua to follow him to their seats, similar to what he had done with Gon. The redhead then took out his cue cards and faced Killua as comfortably as his position allowed him to. "So, Mr. Killua. You are a member of the legendary assassin family of the Zoldick's, aren't you?" "Yyep," replied the boy. "How's it like being raised around people who teach you things that contradict the usual teachings of society?" Killua blinked. "You mean how it's like being raised by sadistic, twisted minded people who keep corpses around their house for ornaments and who can care less about other pathetic morons' lives and loved ones?" The host blinked. "Uhm...Mr. Killua, I'd much rather prefer my version of the question." Killua shrugged nonchalantly. "Oh well, but I think my version was more specific." He then looked up, not aware of his host's huge sweatdrop. The white-haired boy seemed to be deep in thought. "It has its advantages and disadvantages. I get to be stronger than the next person for one thing." "Yes, we've heard of you opening a door with quite a number of tons during one time in your show," said the host with a small nod. "Hehe, pretty good for a boy my age if I say so myself. That got better when I learned how to use nen. Well, anyway, the disadvantage is that I can't relate much to other people's beliefs. Like that time with Gon's Aunt Mito. I got myself slapped on the face because I wanted to kill the poor fox bear cub!" A series of boos emitted from the crowd. Obviously, they didn't like the idea of their proclaimed god being slapped (even if a slap would be but an ant's bite compared to the other pains Killua has experienced, but their minds seemed too fogged up to remember that). Thus, as if having but one mind to control them all, all the Killua fans in the audience brought out a bunch of Mito merchandise and started mutilating them with needles, hand bags, shoes, hair pins, brooches, forks, wooden cabinets, laundry soaps, and many other things too questionable to mention. "HEY!" Killua yelled, seeing the audience's current activity. "I LIKE Aunt Mito! Drop those things right now!" he ordered, pointing a menacing finger at them all. As if caught doing something extremely bad, the fans all hid the mutilated pictures and plushies (mostly decapitated to the horror of some who hate to be disapproved by 'Killua-sama'). Sewing kits were immediately brought out. Kurama, in attempts to ease the atmosphere down, ushered Killua to go back to his seat. "So, Mr. Killua, despite saying that 'Aunt Mito' slapped you, you said you liked her. Why?" "Because she's very nice," replied the young Zoldick with a big smile. "She's the one who showed me what a real mother can do. Not that I'm saying that I hate my mom, of course. She just tends to do these irritating practices that make me want to claw at her face." Kurama's eyes were fixed on the cards he held in his hands, eyes widened incredulously. "Which...you actually did, according to my sources..." A huge sweatdrop. Killua laughed. "Yep, I did! Well, we kind of got into a fight, but it was nothing major." 'Nothing major!? I can't even raise my voice on 'kaasan!' thought the disturbed host. Then again, he couldn't picture his dear, sweet mother being like Killua's loud one, ushering him to kill and torture other people over and over. She'd rather rot and die than see her Shuuichi do such things. She can't even stand killing a measly cockroach for one thing. It was a good thing she's still oblivious to Kurama's past lest she dies from heart attack. "Now, speaking of families," continued Kurama, in attempts to dismiss the fact that he and Killua had different views of their own mothers. "Mr. Gon had mentioned something about your eldest brother, Illumi. Your match during the last part of the Hunter Exam seemed to be the most intriguing of all among the others in the show. Can you tell us more about this 'Illumi'?" Killua frowned, obviously disliking the subject. He then faced the camera, an annoyed look on his face. "Aniki's the coldest, meanest, most arrogant and manipulative man I’ve ever met." * * * * * "Aah-choo!" Hisoka turned around from the television to the door, from where he heard the distinct sound of a familiar voice. He grinned at the sight of Illumi's graceful form, slightly bothered by his momentary sneeze. "Oh! Good evening to you too," greeted the magician, pressing the 'mute' button on the remote control. "Damn it," cursed the young man, ignoring the other's greeting. "I don't believe this. Vitamins these days don't work like they used to." And upon saying this, Illumi all but acknowledged the owner of the room unlike he usually would have, and merely stepped inside and sniffled after closing the door, rubbing his head irately. "Hey, have you heard? Your annoying brother's on TV!" said Hisoka with his ever-present smile enough to freeze hell over. In the midst of fixing himself, Illumi looked up to place his gaze upon the magician. He blinked. "Miruki?" A small sweatdrop. Illumi isn't one who'd practice favoritism among his siblings, but sometimes he can be really distinct with his opinion of them. "No, the other annoying brother," replied the magician. He watched his friend take his place beside him. "What's that?" he asked, pointing at the silent TV, the remark about brothers already forgotten at the mere sight of the white-haired boy on the screen. "Some talk show." Hisoka again pressed the 'mute' button to restore the sounds of the television. Fortunately, he took away the voices when he did. Illumi didn't hear the comment his brother gave about him. And Hisoka. As if fate knew all too well what the eldest Zoldick and the mysterious magician's hidden tempers could do... * * * * * (Back at the studio, this was the conversation upon Illumi's arrival; right after Hisoka muted the TV.) Kurama laughed. "That answer seems very familiar," he commented amusedly, thinking back on his first interviewee. "I suppose that kind of says that Illumi-san somehow is the way you and Mr. Gon described him to be." "Somehow? There's no somehow here. He IS the way Gon and I described him to be! He's a walking iceberg who has an inflated head just because he knows I won't argue with him. Like he's so special. Well, he is, but that's beside the point. Besides, I'll be stronger than him when I grow up to his age. And I'm gonna kill him too! Then I'm gonna live the life of a hermit or be with Gon! " A burst of maniacal laughter. "Now now, that isn't very nice. You wouldn't want your aniki to hear that, would you?" asked the host good-naturedly, trying to ease down Killua's harsh words. But Kurama's attempts in calming Killua down were in vain. The boy grunted, dismissing the subject. "Oh, don't worry. He's probably somewhere busy fu***** the hell out of Hisoka." For a whole minute, the studio was silent. Koenma could only be thankful that his staff brought the right equipments to censor Killua's vulgar words. The audience, though, who weren't privileged enough to have Killua's words censored, were plainly...still. It was Kurama who broke the silence. With an uneasy cough, he faced Killua again. "Uh...Killua, would you mind watching your words please? Maybe we should respect your brother a bit more. Besides, we're on General Patronage." Killua blinked. "Oh...would you prefer it if I said it as 'Aniki _screwing_ the hell out of Hisoka' then?" The screen went blank. * * * * * "What happened?" asked a (thankfully) oblivious Illumi, who was now met with a frowning Hisoka. Right after he sat himself beside the magician, and right after the other pressed the mute button, the screen suddenly went blank. "Beats me," shrugged Hisoka in reply, and just stared at the dark screen. A few seconds passed, and he finally lost his patience. "Forget it. Let's watch something else and get back to this later," he said, pressing a few numbers on the remote. He grinned and faced the other. "Do you watch Cartoon Network?" The TV flashed to another channel. The theme song of Captain Planet blared around the room. "Hisoka!" Illumi winced at the very sound of the annoying, kiddy and Earth-friendly song. "Have you no respect for yourself?" he asked, a slight hint of disgust on his eternally passive face. He then made a grab for the remote and pressed a new set of numbers. "Disney is SO much better." * * * * * In another side of the city, Killua's friends were watching the show with pale, wide-eyed expressions. None of them seem to be in his proper state of mind, for the mere mention of the fearful magician and Killua's just as fearful aniki sent a shiver right up their spines. As if individual thoughts of them weren't bad enough... For some reason, perhaps out of their protective instinct, Leorio and Kurapika woke up from the daze to check on their youngest companion. Seeing Gon's white skin, Leorio patted the child's head in attempts to reassure him. Gon looked up wide-eyed. "Is it true? I didn't know Hisoka and Illumi were like that..." his voice trailed off as his eyes went back to the blank screen. An uneasy laugh escaped from the doctor's throat. "Come on, Gon. Hisoka may be weird enough to be like that, but I doubt Killua's brother is. Besides, you know Killua, of course it's not true." Upon saying this, the two elders caught each other's pale expressions. "Then again...Illumi IS kind of weird himself. He has long hair and could pass for--well, you know..." Kurapika nodded meekly. Leorio leaned over his best friend, making sure that their young companion wouldn't hear. His voice came out a whisper. "This is weird, help me out here. It's not true...is it?" Kurapika didn't answer, but his and Leorio's lines of thought were mutual. An uncomfortably graphic picture was immediately set up inside their well-informed minds. Soon, like expertly choreographed reactions, their stillness was broken by violent, icy spasms. "Damn it, Leorio, never ask me that question again." A pause. Hisoka's manic grin. Another shudder. "Ever." * * * * * Kurama's smiling face appeared on the screen again a few minutes after the black out. He seemed to be rather disheveled and paler than he was supposed to be though. But whatever happened behind the blank screen would most probably be better left unknown. "In behalf of our sponsors and staff, I apologize for the slight...difficulties we've just had in the show. For safety purposes, please take note of the 'Parental Guidance' warning that can now be seen on the bottom of your screens. If we may, Mr. Killua, shall we continue?" asked the still uneasy host. Killua, amused with the host, nodded with a grin. He liked the guy. He's very nice. Kind of like Kurapika. Only nicer. But on the other side of the stage, the feeling wasn't exactly mutual. 'Somebody better remind me why I went through with this job. Maybe I should've taken it as Youko Kurama or something...' Kurama glanced at his cue card. "Last time we interviewed Mr. Gon, there was a part there about yaoi. Unfortunately, a few things were put in check, and we just decided to hear your side of the story instead." Killua sweatdropped. "Yeah, well, Gon's like that," he said with a shrug. "So, what is your take on the topic? By watching certain episodes of the series (not to mention that disturbing comment about your brother), it is clear that you possess a mind whose knowledge with such things go beyond those of your age. The possibility of having a better answer from you is high." A pale eyebrow rose, a grin growing in Killua's ever so confident lips. "I love the way you twist words to make them safe, you know that? We're already in Parental Guidance, you can start going frankly," he commented, his grin growing wider upon seeing the sweatdrop on the host's face. "Uh...I'd rather not. My mother's watching," beamed the host playfully, a shaky laugh coming out of his lips. Killua shrugged and just proceeded on answering. "About the whole yaoi thing, not that I have anything against people who support it or anything (I might lose my fans if I say anything, hehe), but come on! I mean, look at Gon. He wouldn't know what shounen romance is even if it punched him right on the face. Besides, he's my best friend, his innocence is one of his main traits. I'll never let anybody harm that...or anything that belongs to him for that matter." The last part was said with sharp emphasis. Killua faced the audience, a distinct sparkle in his eyes. All Mito merchandize were all out of sight in a second flat. Kurama, afraid of anymore indecent scenes in his show, acted oblivious to the threat. "Okay, that's it for the question and answer part. Let us now go to the next part of our show," he said, shifting in his seat to face the camera. "This segment is a new idea made by our director, in replacement for the failed experiment with the other segment last time (we've learned our lesson)." He then shifted a glance at the audience, the Killua banners proving that removing the For the Audience segment was a good idea. "Instead, we will have another special guest for tonight. He is said to be Mr. Killua's counterpart in Yu Yu Hakusho. Egotism over my anime home aside, YYH is Mr. Togashi's other famous work prior to Hunter X Hunter. We figured that it may rise a bit of interest to speak with the man himself. Let's bring in, Mr. Hiei Jaganshi!" A round of applause sounded as a small, dark figure emerged from the shadows, revealing a young man in a black cloak, his spiky black hair graced with the well-known starburst in the middle. He wordlessly sat himself on the seat next to Killua, not even acknowledging the bright-as-usual smile of the host. "Hello, Hiei. How are you?" "Just get on with it, kitsune. I'm supposed to be sleeping," came the cold reply. Kurama let out an uneasy laugh. "Okay," he said, knowing fully well how his friend values his sleep. Kurama turned to Killua. "Now, Killua, what do you think of him?" Killua, who had been staring at Hiei ever since the guy stepped on the stage, blinked incredulously. "This guy's MY counterpart?" he asked, turning to Kurama. Hiei stole a sidelong glance of the kid next to him. "Any problem with that, brat?" he asked. "Well..." Killua scowled. After a few minutes of staring and contemplation, with an air of importance, he finally spoke again. "You're small," he said a-matter-of-factly. "Uhm..." Kurama immediately tried to step in, but failed to do so. The glare Hiei was now sporting was too intense to break through. But still, maybe he should've warned Killua to watch his words. Hiei isn't fond of conversation. Neither does he like children. In fact, he doesn't really like people in general. But most especially, he isn't fond of. Insults. Regarding. His. Height. "And your point is...?" ushered a now irritated Hiei, who was dangerously close to pulling out his katana. Either that, or he was in the midst of pulling away the bandage that was wrapped around his right arm. But Killua ignored these 'signs of danger' and just turned to Kurama again. "Mind you, my height is completely normal. I'm even taller than Gon! Hell, I think I'm even taller than this midget!" An eye twitched. "Midget? Mid-get!?" The chair beside Killua was violently pushed back. "Height is not everything, kid!" bellowed a gravely annoyed Hiei. "I get dragged in here by a bunch of foolish humans to be treated like this!? You dare insult me!? The right-hand man of one of the rare class-S youkai, the fear of Makai's many kingdoms, the wielder of the kokuryuuha!?" Killed blinked innocently, albeit carelessly. "The who--?" he asked, further infuriating the man in front of him. "I AM _THE_ HIEI OF MAKAI, YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING WISE-ASS!" Killua stuck his tongue out. "Your name stinks." "Back at you!" "Uh," Kurama scratched his head, and proceeded on watching his beautiful stage ransacked by two distinctly fast figures that can barely be seen by the naked eye. "Ne, blood pressures, you two. We wouldn't want our dear paramedics to be overworked now, would we?" Seeing that he was deliberately being ignored, Kurama just shifted to more desperate measures. Facing the camera, he smiled good-naturedly and spoke with all the remaining charm he had. "Commercials?" * * * * * "I told you your brother was a brat. Now do you understand why I think Gon's a better target?" Illumi--still (thankfully) ignorant of everything his brother had said--scowled, ignoring his friend while keeping himself from being more annoyed with the irritatingly cutesy commercial with the irritatingly cutesy bears with irritatingly cutesy chocolate sprinkles. He could feel his ears caving in on him due to the tremendously high pitch of the kiddy song. He could've sworn he heard the crystal glass on the cupboard crack. "This sucks," he commented irately. He faced Hisoka, a frown still marring his face. "Can I have the remote now? My favorite episode of Tarzan's on!" * * * * * Kurama's face appeared immediately right after a few commercials. He was standing in the audience seats. Where the stage disappeared to was clearly unknown. Mysteries were so rampant in that night's episode. "Er, that's it for tonight's episode, minna! It was fun in a way, wasn't it?" he asked, his cheeriness back in place despite the many questionable things that happened after the commercials. The sound of breaking wood went soon after Kurama's inquiry, only to be followed by an extremely loud crash. The host merely ignored this though. "I apologize for not having our two guests here with me to say goodbye. They are quite busy getting to know each other." Another crash. "Aw, come on, you can do better than that!" "You're a kid! Yusuke and Kurama will kill me if I do anything, you egotistical brat!" "Hah! Kid, my foot! Admit it, that's all that you can do!" "Why you--" All of these were heard from behind the camera. Kurama though, still didn't seem to pay the voices any heed. "Thank you so much for being with us, I hope you all enjoyed tonight's show. For our next interview, we shall have Mr. Leorio, also a close friend of Mr. Gon and Mr. Killua. This is your ever devoted host, Kurama, wishing you all a warm goodnight!" And with that, the scene began to fade, the show's theme song echoing in the background. A round of mechanical applause sounded, obviously ushered by the staff. They, too, seemed to be acting mechanically though. All eyes fixed on the stage. Kurama's the only one who seemed to be happy and at ease. Being Hiei's best friend was definitely a good thing sometimes. The ending credits were beginning to end, but before that, a final voice rang through the whole studio. "That's IT! Kid or no kid, I've had enough! JAOU ENSATSU KOKURYUUHA!!!" End of Episode 2 A/N: Blah! That was insane. This is what happens when a fanfic is written without plans =P
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Part 3
Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino Notes and Disclaimers: Hunter X Hunter and Yu Yu Hakusho are both owned by Mr. Yoshihiro Togashi. Though the content of these interviews are based on the anime, not all reflect the truth. There are times when the characters will be twisted. Beware of possible spoilers from time to time. YYH Characters / Terminologies mentioned: Shuuichi Minamino / Kurama - see chapter 1. Koenma Daioh - see chapter 1. Kazuma Kuwabara - said to be Leorio's counterpart in Yu Yu Hakusho. He isn't exactly very bright (though his diligence and dedication make up for that), nor very good-looking. His strongest point leans more on the emotional side. He's the most human among the four main characters (both literally and figuratively speaking). Yukina - the love of Kazuma's life. Also, Hiei's twin sister. She is the reason why Kazuma and Hiei fight most of the time, but the good girl's oblivious to all these. Yusuke Urameshi - Kazuma's best friend, and the main character of YYH. Kazuma tends to risk his life for Yusuke more than once. Supposedly, Yusuke is Gon's counterpart, but he really looks more like Jin Freeces if you ask me. Then again, Jin is Gon's dad, so there isn't much difference. Episode 3 - Leorio Gon swayed his legs back and forth as he watched Leorio's reflection on the mirror. The doctor proceeded on dressing himself up for his interview. Killua was beside him on the bed, lying on his stomach, and doing pretty much the same thing as Gon was. Trying to strike up conversation, Gon turned to his white-haired best friend and grinned. "Isn't Kurama-san nice, Killua?" he asked cheerfully. Killua though, doesn't seem to be in the mood to grin back. The bed shifted slightly as Killua sat up, crossing his legs, a pale hand coming up to rub a bandaged lower arm. "I guess..." he mumbled, suppressing a scowl at the expected shot of pain of his own touch. "How he even came up with such a violent friend is beyond me though." Looking back on his own interview, Killua knew that he had been lucky to have survived. It was a good thing that Kurama was there to stop the hysterical Hiei before he fried Killua to death with that creepy black dragon of his. If only he wasn't at the receiving end of that fiery, insanely humongous mouth, he would've thought that the dragon was cool. Killua decided then and there that Hiei Jaganshi sucks. Can't the guy take a joke? At least Hisoka would've. Hell, even his brother would've, relatively speaking. And speaking of Hisoka and Illumi, the strangest thing just happened. Right after the interview, Illumi just sent him a smiley, one with a tongue out and an "X" for an eye. Also, aside from the smiley, there was a series of arrows and dashes that outlined what looked very much like a figure of a dragon. In the end, the picture looked like a dead blob of a smiley in the mouth of a spiral dragon. For a moment, Killua wondered if his brother knew about what he said about him and Hisoka, and was angry with him and was giving him a death threat through his mobile phone. Of course, killing him would mean killing the heir of the family, but knowing Illumi, that can easily be fixed. But the idea of death threat was immediately erased from his mind when, at the end of the message was a figure of Illumi (designed and added personally on Illumi's phone by Miruki obviously, that family heir-hating, apple-sucking, aniki's favorite wannabe) giving him a big brotherly digital hug. But if that wasn't weird enough, he also received a message from Hisoka. The guy was asking whether or not it was scientifically possible for gorillas to communicate with humans, because as far as he was concerned, coherent words exist only in the human realm. He also added that the maker of Tarzan was an idiot. Just when he was about to tell the guy that Tarzan was just a child's tale and should not be taken seriously, Killua shook himself awake to remind himself that this was Hisoka he was talking to. The guy never took anything seriously. Shifting his eyes between his brother and Hisoka's messages, the third Zoldick child concluded that the two were spending far too much time together. Gon's words broke through Killua's thoughts. "Well, it's your fault. You shouldn't have insulted Hiei-san like that." Killua frowned. "I was just being honest," he defended. Looking for a third opinion, he shifted his eyes to another member of their small group. "What do you think Kurapika?" No response. "Er, Kurapika?" As if waking up from a daze, Kurapika turned to Killua, blinking. "Uh, yes? What is it?" asked the young Kuruta. "Penny for your thoughts," said Leorio, who was now fixing his hair, looking at Kurapika through the mirror. Kurapika tilted his head on one side. "I was just wondering...there's an audience seat in that studio. How come we only watch each other's interviews from TV?" A long pause. Three pairs of eyes blinked at each other for what felt like five minutes, only to settle back to look at the pair of blue eyes who was watching their thinking process. Killua raised an eyebrow. "Now there's an idea." * * * * * "Good evening everyone! Here we are again, with another special guest for tonight. But before we introduce him to you, I would like to acknowledge the presence of Mr. Gon and Mr. Killua, who have been wonderful guests themselves, and Mr. Kurapika, who are currently in the audience seats tonight." In the front row, Gon and Killua cheerfully waved at the nice host. Kurapika gave Kurama a polite bow. But just when Kurama was about to call that night's guest, a sudden commotion erupted from the audience seats. All eyes shifted to the cloud of smoke that magically appeared right where Gon, Killua and Kurapika were sitting in. There were various screams that go around, "Oh my God, I'm actually touching the Killua Zoldick!" to "Oh Gon-chan, what brand of gel do you use? Do you like apple? I like APPLE!". But there were the most distinct squeals that can be heard. Apparently, popularity was a dangerous subject when you're... "KURAPIKA~!!!!!" The look of sheer horror was evident in Kurapika's eyes. Of all the main cast of Hunter X Hunter, he was the introvert, the one who dislikes the presence of crowds, the one who was soft-spoken and would prefer to be left alone, but apparently, also the most popular. He and Killua were nose to nose in competing for that title, but while the die-hard fans of Killua only range around girls mostly, Kurapika has his share of both genders. There were still those who see him as female after all. Enjoying the look on his elder's face, Killua decided to play the role of the tormentor. He grinned and called for the other over the chaotic scene. "Kurapika! I think I know why we're told to stay in the hotel!" Kurapika wasn't given the chance to answer, for the only choice he had was to flee. Immediately. To say that the studio was shaking would be an understatement. Koenma, the director who was supposedly used to overzealous fans, was in the verge of hysteria upon seeing his newly beautified studio being wrecked all over again. "THIS PLACE HAS JUST BEEN RENOVATED! AS IF THE BLACK DRAGON WASN'T BAD ENOUGH! WHAT DO YOU TAKE ME FOR, A GOD OR SOMETHING!?!?" Kurama watched all these in silence, being that he was safe right where he was. He didn't feel like helping Koenma. After all, the guy just argued with him a few days ago about getting security guards. So instead, the mischievous wolf in sheep's clothing of a host lifted his microphone and spoke, "Ne Koenma-sama. Does the phrase 'I told you so' ring a bell?" * * * * * "This show is getting more violent by the episode," commented Hisoka, who was watching the whole thing from the safety of his hotel room. Beside him, Illumi sat quietly, watching his brother and his friends being trashed around. "Your brother's got lots of fans, doesn't he?" asked the magician with a grin. A wince. "If Killua is to be defeated by a bunch of schoolgirls, I'll tie myself to him and throw us both off a cliff." Hisoka watched Illumi glare at the screen. He was obviously pissed off with the squealing fans. But instead of reassuring his friend, Hisoka's grin only widened. "Yeah? Can I push you?" He was rewarded with a glare. They went on watching, up until the screen went blank again. As expected by now. "Ne, Illumi?" Illumi shifted his eyes from the TV to Hisoka. "What?" "I was reading through the library yesterday - would you believe that? hehe! - and I swear by your father's grave that gorillas don't talk." "Just drop the whole gorilla thing, for cryin' out loud!" Illumi was now regretting that he even allowed Hisoka to watch Tarzan, ignoring the tearful reply of "Killua didn't even help!" from the magician. But really, how was he to know that sharing his favorite cartoon with his best friend would be a bad idea? And after all, he was--wait a second... "What do you mean my father's grave!?" * * * * * "Good evening again!" Lights were distinctively lacking as far as studio lights were concerned. Kurama's surrounding seemed rather dark, and strangely, there were tiny white dots behind him, twinkling as if they were stars. And there was also a moon. "That's right, we'll be having our interview on our studio's roof. Just for fun," said the host, gracing the camera with an innocent grin. Everyone knew that they were having the show up on the roof because the studio is not anywhere near being presentable. The earlier mob saw to that. It was Killua's idea, perhaps finally taking pity on his elder comrade - and his current state just as well - who was more than grateful for the slight shift. A few paces behind the camera sat Gon, Killua (who was mildly tattered), and Kurapika (who was more than severely tattered). Koenma sat in the director's seat, with something that looked like an icepack resting atop his forehead. "Now, to go on (with our insanely late show), let us bring in, Mr. Leorio!" The only sounds of applause came from the three-people audience. Gon and Killua were enthusiastically cheering for Leorio, while Kurapika kept his composure beside Killua. Leorio waved at the three. "Mr. Leorio comes from a small village in the Hunter World, who planned to become a Hunter. But his purposes run deeper than that, for he initially wanted to become a doctor. Now, much as we want to tell everybody why he wanted to become a Hunter, Leorio-san refused to share any further information." Kurama sighed sadly, thinking of what a waste it would be for him not to tell the world about the doctor's nobility. Apparently, he wasn't the only one who thought this way. "Leorio wanted to be a Hunter so he could help sick people for free!" cried somebody from the darkness behind the camera. But despite the lack of vision from both people on the, er "stage", they recognized who it was. Kurama smiled, watching Leorio cast a death glare in the direction of the voice. "Uh, thank you, Gon. That was very helpful, don't you think so, Leorio-san?" The doctor shifted his glare, and if only they weren't on air, he could've sworn that Leorio would've stuck his tongue out at him. But nevertheless, the doctor finally let out a defeated sigh and shrank back down on his seat. "Now, since we're on the topic, we might as well get on with it," started Kurama, seeing that Leorio seemed to be ready to answer his questions. "It's rare to find somebody wanting to do things the way you want them to. Yes, I suppose that it is true that goodness is initially deep within every human, but Leorio-san, your dream is far too selfless that it would be impossible to think that you came up with this thought on your own. Would you care to share with us what inspired you?" Leorio shrugged. "Most HxH fans would know my story, but I guess I might as well share it anyway. I came from a poor family. My best friend died from a fatal disease, but we could've saved him if we had more money. But the biggest regret during that time was that I was already aspiring to become a doctor. But seeing him die like he did, I knew that what I do is not enough. No matter how infuriating it is, money is always involved as far as human lives are concerned." He stopped for a while to see if anybody would disagree. Seeing the host nod his head for him, he continued. "Somehow, I wanted to take that living fact away from people like me. Life is much too precious, and not saving it just because of money is just cruel. But I know that medical equipments are expensive, which is probably the reason why some doctors won't help for free. I'm doing what I do so that I can make up for past mistakes. Say that I'm doing it for Pietro. Or maybe I just like taking care of people. I can take the Hunter Exam, albeit not easily. If I can pay my friend by doing this, why the hell not?" Kurama smiled at this, and most probably more than half the staff as well. But not everyone shared the same sentiments. A deep grunt sounded behind the camera, followed by another voice. "You think as if everything's your fault. The world doesn't revolve around you. You think far too much, your life is practically run by the dead." Leorio snarled at the owner of the voice. "Look who's talking. The only difference between us, my dear sweet and thoughtful friend, is the number of dead people that we base our life on." "At least I don't blame myself for the past. I just live for the justice not given." "So what if I blame myself? At least I don't go through crazy bouts of misery that would end me up on the edge of a high building." Several more lines were exchanged between the two, each people's statement getting weirder by the minute. Kurama merely listened for a while, waiting for them to finish. But in the midst of Leorio saying, "Of course not, rabbits don't make sounds! And their ears are pink on the inside, NOT blue!" Kurama picked up the glass of water on the coffee table between his and Leorio's seat. After taking a small gulp, he set the glass down and cleared his throat. "What are you talking about!? Red, orange and purple make up a sunset! What did--" The last statement was cut off, followed by the distinct sounds of ruffling and strangling and struggling. A few seconds later, Killua's, "Kurapika, you both aren't making any sense anymore!" came through the whole commotion. "Right, the battle is a draw!" declared Kurama suddenly, leading the furious doctor back to his seat. "Who would've thought that arguing about the difference between a 12-color set of colored pencils and a 24-colored one would be so exciting?" This earned the host a death glare from the doctor, but he went on smiling nonetheless. "Assuming that the little sidetracking is over, shall we go on with our interview?" Leorio kept his silence and stubbornly avoided the host's glance, so Kurama opted for looking at the director. Koenma raised a thumbs-up sign for him to go on. "After the story of Pietro, Leorio-san's story now shifts to the Hunter Exam. This is where he met his three friends, Gon, Killua and Kurapika." He stopped to take note of the glare exchanged between Leorio and the owner of the last name mentioned. "But the details of the Hunter Exam, I think, is more focused on Gon and Killua. So now, we will go through deeper matters regarding the things that happened during that time." Kurama paused, reading through his cue cards for a while with a thoughtful look. "Though I doubt that this is the right time to ask this question, I will go on anyway. Leorio-san, - Leorio-san, please stop sulking and making the hole on the couch obvious for the whole world to see - would you please tell us about your relationship with Kurapika-san?" Leorio finally stopped to meet Kurama's gaze with a distinct 'what-kind-of-question-is-THAT!?' look. And he wasn't the only one who thought that way. "What kind of question is THAT!?" yelled a voice again. Another bout of ruffling and strangling and struggling came to check. Knowing that he needed to explain himself, explain Kurama did. "Various scenes led fans to the conclusion that Leorio-san and Kurapika-san's friendship is far too sweet for words. Episode 62 saw to that. Others, specifically the yaoists, think that there is something more than what meets the eye. I think," Kurama carefully spoke these words. Leorio seemed to be on the verge of throwing a fit. "That clarifications are in check." "Kurapika and I are friends, what the hell is wrong with that!?" "Oh I dunno. Apart from acting like husband and wife..." contributed Killua helpfully. There was a crash that sounded afterwards. A few seconds later, an unidentified flying object with a white tuft of hair that looks so much like Killua's came flying through the gap between Kurama and Leorio's seats. Said UFO came falling down the building and into the oblivion of city lights that were behind the two's places. There was a wailing cry that sounded very much like, "Watch the bandaaaaaaaaage...!!!" that faded as the UFO disappeared from view. "Killua!" cried another voice, obviously Gon's. "Kurapika, what've you done!?" Following this, the blurred figure of Gon dragging Kurapika behind him came crashing with the coffee table. But the boy didn't seem to care about tables at the moment, for he stood on the edge of the building calling out his best friend's name in vain, and decided that he should go look for him. "Don't you dare jump!" yelled Kurapika, but Gon being Gon, he found no threat in the young Kuruta's words. And Gon being Gon, there is no hesitation involved when it comes to saving his friends. And so, with things established as so, there is no surprise when he went behind Kurapika, and with the words, "We've got to find him!", pushed him off, and followed by jumping off himself. * * * * * "You're brother's dead." "Yeah? Well, your target's dead, too." A pause. "Plus the blonde. Wasn't he your ally last time?" "Serves him right. That traitor. He may not have killed Kuroro, but he took his nen ability away. Tell me that wasn't fair." Sarcastic tone. "That wasn't fair." Equally sarcastic tone. "Oh, thank you, your obedient loyalty astounds me." * * * * * At this rate, I might as well work as a commercial model for aspirins, thought Koenma as he gulped down yet another one of the said medicine, his fifth all in a matter of half a week. On the "stage", Leorio was still staring dumbfounded at the spot where his friends...er, took a nosedive for the highway hundreds of feet above the ground. Koenma sighed and gave Kurama the signal to go on. "We, er, should continue," said Kurama finally, straightening himself up. "I think this would be a good time for you to answer the question, Leorio-san." "Question? Uh, huh? Oh, right, the interview. Say, wait a minute," he said, now facing past the camera, his eyes on the small form of the director. "Do you think those guys would be all right?" I don't know, you're the doctor, thought Koenma sarcastically, but chose not to say it out loud. "Yes, they won't be listed in the Book of the Dead for more than sixty years or so help me God. Just get on with it!" Leorio, though still shaken, sighed in relief and faced the host again. "Right, so...Kurapika. Okay, to be honest, I initially thought that he's a girl. I mean, who could blame me, he does look like one. A pretty girl at that if you stop and think about it. But no, he and I are strictly friends. As far as I'm concerned anyway. At least I know I'm straight, dunno about him. He wears an earring after all, so, go figure." A sweatdrop was on Kurama's head. "We'll clarify this in Kurapika-san's interview. Right now, we're running out of time. So, no romance, Leorio-san?" A snort. "I would rather die. Besides, the day I swear my undying love for Kurapika is the day I sign the devil's contract. After all, Kurapika is the reincarnation of the devil himself, or so Killua and I suspect." Another sweatdrop. "Uh...right, very well. I think it is best for us to go to our next segment. Despite the...uh, difficulties last time with this part of the show, the staff believes that we could give it another shot. And so, allow me to introduce tonight's special guest, said to be Mr. Leorio's YYH counterpart, Mr. Kazuma Kuwabara!" The only sound of applause came from Kurama as a tall figure of a young man walked towards the "stage". There was a seat next to Leorio, and this was where Kazuma, a tall, well-muscled young man with a tuft of bright orange hair on his head, sat. There was a moment of silence and stillness, filled only with Kurama's friendly smile at his comrade's entrance. "Good evening, Kazuma-san," greeted Kurama. "Good evening to you two as well," greeted Kazuma back. But like they say, history tends to repeat itself. Leorio stared at the Kazuma Kuwabara in silence. But unlike Killua, Leorio wisely chose to keep his opinions to himself. But nevertheless, that didn't stop him from being opinionated. Man, this guy's ugly, thought the doctor, still staring at the red-haired "counterpart". From the chair on Leorio's right, Kazuma was having the same line of thought. This is my counterpart? So, whose counterpart is that good-looking guy with blonde hair? I mean, I'm far too pretty to be compared with this guy over here. Hm, maybe they took pity on him and decided that putting him beside someone as good-looking as I am would make him presentable at least. Poor guy. But I guess not everybody is as gifted as I am. Kurama spoke again, breaking the two's lines of thought. "Kazuma Kuwabara, in many ways than one, is very much like Leorio-san here. He is undeniably the most noble among the four main character of YYH, and is very much devoted to his friends--hey, what does that supposed to mean, Koenma? Am I not noble enough spending years of patience with Hiei?" Koenma sweatdropped. "Come on, Kurama, let it go. You didn't die for Hiei, did you?" I mean, you're smart enough to not die for him, unlike Kuwabara who'd jump at every opportunity to save Yusuke. But that's beside the point. Give Kuwabara a bit of credit, that's all he'll ever have. I mean, look at him. The guy's looks leave much to be desired. Kurama tried to suppress his amusement at the message Koenma brought to him, just in case Kazuma would see. Kazuma was his friend after all. "Anyway, as I was saying, Kazuma Kuwabara is noble, selfless, emotional, etc. He cares very much for his friends, like Leorio-san here. As for power in comparison to their teammates, both aren't what one would call strong, but they're never idle and contributes mainly to the welfare of the group." Kurama finished his introduction and faced Kuwabara and Leorio. "So, is there anything you'd like to ask each other?" "Uh," started Kuwabara, being that he hadn't said anything except for the greeting. He isn't that bad looking, but I really was expecting the blonde. Maybe we're paired because of the personality. Yeah, maybe that's why. "So, you done with your studies yet?" he asked politely. "Yep," replied Leorio, who was in turn also eyeing the other. Butt ugly really. It's a good thing Togashi-sama decided to make all the characters of Hunter X Hunter more attractive. I can't imagine myself in YYH looking like this. Wow, this guy's got guts to even appear on TV. "I'm practicing for experience in a small clinic where me and my friends live. I hear you fight a lot with your best friend? Me too, Kurapika's a pain in the ass sometimes." Aah, so the blonde's name is Kurapika. I wonder why Kurapika wasn't paired with the best-looking guy in YYH, aka yours truly. Don't tell me he was paired with Kurama. Kurama's pretty handsome I guess, but everyone knows I'm hotter than he is. "Yeah, well, you haven't seen half of it. Do you watch our show? I'm literally killed twice because of Yusuke." Not gifted with a good face, not gifted even with a good friend. Really, can the heavens be that cruel? And Kurama said this guy was selfless and nice. I pray he goes to heaven, the poor man. "Lucky you're still alive." This guy's single, I'm sure. I'm so blessed, at least I have Yukina-san, when this one is not. Really, can the heavens be that cruel? And Kurama said this guy was selfless and nice. I pray he goes to heaven, the poor man. "Very lucky." A small nod. Another small nod. "Great, now everybody's friends now," said Kurama, grinning at the two. "You know, it's good that you two liked each other. The first two interviews weren't exactly this peaceful." Both Leorio and Kazuma nodded their agreement, though thinking the same, If only he knew... "Much as we would like to let this go longer, we're running out of time for our show. I would like to thank our guests tonight, Leorio-san, Kazuma-san. It's been a pleasure having you both tonight." He graced the camera with a generous smile. "That's it for tonight, everyone. For our next interview, we shall have Mr. Kura--" he cast a sidelong glance behind him, towards the very same spot where Leorio's friends jumped off to "save" Killua, and continued, "Er, Kurapika, Leorio-san's, and also Gon's and Killua's, friend. He is the last of the main group for the HxH cast, but not to worry, the interviews will not stop with him just yet. "In behalf of the staff and YYH, this is your host, Kurama. For now, goodbye and a pleasant evening to everyone!" * * * * * Speaking of pleasant evenings, there were quite a number of people who are convinced that they have witnessed a miracle. From a distance a few meters from the building where the HxH interviews are being aired, the distinct sounds of an ambulance, several police cars, and a fire truck can be heard. There was quite a commotion surrounding a certain tree in the sidewalk, where there was said to be three shooting stars that fell from the evening sky. "I heard voices! It was from another realm, I tell you, there is life from another planet!" said one "witness". "I was just walking home when I heard this crash. It landed somewhere up in that tree. There are three of them," said another. "Angels! They had wings, and they were singing so beautifully!" said a more delusional one. "Angels!? I heard one of them say the 'F' word!" retorted another. Unknown to the crowd below, the three said "shooting stars" are starting to wake up from their daze. There was a pained groan from one of them. "Oh good lord, I think I broke an arm," Another groan, only to be followed by an irritated hiss. "Gon, if only you're not well-loved enough to drive an insane mob after me, I'm going to hurt you so badly you'd wish you were a Zoldick. " End of Episode 3 A/N: *sweatdrops* Ookay...the moral of the story? Never write a fanfic without an initial plan. They tend to go senseless when left otherwise.
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Part 4
Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino Notes and Disclaimers: Oh, look! This fanfic is still alive after all! ^^; Hunter X Hunter and Yu Yu Hakusho are both owned by Mr. Yoshihiro Togashi. Though the content of these interviews are based on the anime, not all reflect the truth. There are times when the characters will be twisted. Beware of possible spoilers from time to time. YYH Characters / Terminologies mentioned: Shuuichi Minamino / Kurama - see chapter 1. Koenma Daioh - see chapter 1. Botan - Koenma's assistant as far as the Reikai Tantei are concerned. She is usually called the "Deity of Death", but her personality gravely go against her title. She's bubbly and cheerful, a bit of a ditz sometimes, but that also adds to her appeal ^_______^ Dedication: To Sammi-chan. Thank you so much for your support. Oh yeah, and thanks for that Gon and Killua fighting suggestion, I already thought of something to write ^_____^ I wish you lots of luck with your own fanfics ^.^ Episode 4 - Kurapika "This is stupid." An attractive young male in about his early 20's stood by the hospital counter in the fifth floor, his posture still and dignified. He had short, chocolate-colored hair, and a pale but healthy complexion. He wore a red bandanna that covered most of his forehead. Strangely, he had what looked like a blue pacifier on his mouth, but it didn't seem at all weird to him, for he merely scowled and glared at everyone who stared at him. "Look. I don't know about you, Koenma, but I am not immortal. I have two choices. Either I get this interview over with, which is the best choice if you ask me, or face the wrath of a million fans. Two choices come down if I pick the second option. Either I die, or a million civilians die in my place." "Okay, so Botan gets extra work. Now can we go?" The impatient Reikai prince tapped his foot on the ground, his movements all but pointing at the inviting elevator. He really did want to leave the hospital. He couldn't remember how Kurama even dragged him into it. Something about the show, and fans chasing them to the ends of the Earth if the fourth interview won't come out well. After the third interview, it was reported in the news that three unknown figures have fallen from the top of the Reikai Studios building and landed on a tree standing innocently on the sidewalk. The three were unidentified, because apparently one of them had grown deranged and, with flashy red eyes to boot, destroyed all cameras, films, and tapes with a long, snake-like chain. During the commotion, the two younger ones had pulled their furious companion away, never to be seen again. Personally, Koenma thought that they could move the fifth interview, and just shift the fourth interview to a later place. That Hisoka guy seemed okay with the plan, but it was also he who told them about the possible problem about the fans. Something about the guy scared the socks off the Reikai Prince - though he wouldn't admit that of course. He could've sworn that the guy was from Makai, but he didn't have much time to scan through his records. But nevertheless, he decided that maybe it would be better if he did take in the fourth interview first after all. More time to...er, look for more interesting characters. He seriously doubted he could take away that weird magician for the fifth interview, but who knows, right? "Yes, I can just see it. The Kurama, ranked as one of the strongest class-A youkai around and one who has faced a thousand battles, met death in the eye through a million deranged Kurapika fans. Don't you think that's a bit anti-climactic?" asked Kurama. "Actually, it won't be that bad. Most probably half of Kurapika's fans would also be your fans. So it may not reach millions. Thousands, maybe." Koenma ignored the fact that Kurama just shook his head. But what he did admit was that he was fighting a losing battle. He may be the director, but this was a joint effort between him and Kurama. Besides, the guy did have a point, after all. He wouldn't want a thousand females committing suicide just to be able to reach Reikai to mob him. Reikai is a pretty peaceful place, and he wanted to keep it as that. Koenma sighed. "Fine, you win," he said, casting the annoying fox a glare. He then shifted his gaze at the counter. "Now, if the little nurse would be so kind enough as to stop drooling all over you, maybe we can get this over with!" He emphasized his point by slamming his hand on the counter, waking the innocent nurse who fell for the spell that is Shuuichi Minamino. Immediately, upon seeing those golden eyes glaring fatally at her, the nurse jumped up and pointed to the eastern hall, saying that room 517 was over there. "You shouldn't have scared her like that," scolded Kurama as the two walked towards the hall. "After all, she was drooling all over you, too," he said, a sly grin spreading over his handsome face. The Reikai prince rolled his eyes, dismissing his companion impatiently. "Oh, who cares? She'll marry a fellow nurse, have two kids and die at the age of 73. Typical human life. What's to like?" "You know, you should really stop snooping around the Life files," commented the red-haired host. But after a while, his eye brightened up and he turned towards Koenma again. "I have another good reason why it's better to have the interview here!" The Prince of Death turned to him. "What?" he asked. "We wouldn't have to have an audience! Look, if you remember last time, this Kurapika had so much fans. Ever since the first episode, I think we're both sure of how destructive they are. And look at you in that form. Together, we're the most beautiful men to ever grace Yoshihiro Togashi's works. I'd be shocked if we won't lose the Reikai building all in all!" Koenma considered this for a while. A few moments passed, and he eventually grinned at his companion. "Yes, definitely conceited," he remarked, but with a sly smirk. "But within reason. My friend, I'm afraid I have to agree." They turned towards their last corridor. "Anyway, we might as well go on with it. Do you have that spider with you?" * * * * * Leorio calmly wandered through the halls of the hospital, currently on his way towards the floor's main reception counter to check on his schedule. His eyes briefly gazed down a certain door. He wondered what those two would be doing at the moment. Gon and Killua both asked to be on the same room so they can be together, Killua reasoning that hospitals were boring places especially when you're alone. The doctor shrugged and decided that a tiny peek wouldn't hurt. It could always be excused as a doctor's concern for the well-being of his patients. With Gon and Killua together, who knows what could happen. "Agh! Gon, no!" The indignant voice of a certain white-haired boy rang through his ears, muffled by the thick wooden doors. Leorio blinked. He leaned his head against the door, curious of whatever it was that was going on inside. "Pleeeeeaaase, Killua? It'll make me really happy!" came Gon's voice this time. Sounds of struggling, and of something fall on the floor. "No, I'm too young for this!!! And so are you! Good gods, Gon, you're a boy for cryin' out loud!!!" "So? I find nothing wrong with boys doing this. And it's fun, don't you think so?" "Yes, but...but but--Gon, no!" This time, there was a loud crash, like glass breaking. Alarmed, the doctor behind the doors stood there shocked, his mind twisting and turning as he tried to take in what he just heard. Gon and...Killua? No...it was impossible. He never knew Gon knew about such things. He always seemed to be the innocent one. But now...it almost sounded he was the one after Killua. "Is this okay?" "No, not there!!!" Leorio shook his head. No, it shouldn't be. They're preteen boys for God's sake! Kurapika would kill them if he found out. Determined to set things straight once and for all, the young doctor took a deep breath grabbed the doorknob and - regardless of where he was - bellowed: "STOP THIS INHUMANITY THIS INSTANT!!!" The door was now fully open, and it revealed - to Leorio's chagrin - two beds pushed together, with both their occupants on but one bed. Killua was pinned down by his dark-haired best friend, who he himself was straddling the pale boy, bent over as if looming on his face. Leorio, ever the brotherly figure, gasped and considered closing his eyes, but that was until he saw what Gon held on his right hand. A...pink marker? "Leorio!" came Killua's breathless cry. Using Gon's surprise to the doctor's sudden appearance, he violently pulled one wrist free and started clawing the bed sheets, beckoning the older man to come to his rescue. "Help me, please! He's...he's...he wants to draw a pink kitten on my face!!!" Leorio stood gaping at the two, but the constant whining caught his attention. Still in a daze, he turned his gaze over to the boy underneath the other who looked like he was near tears. "Excuse me?" asked the doctor uneasily, and sweatdrop coming down the side of his head. "Pink kitties are cute, but Killua won't believe me!" defended Gon, a pout marring his young face. "Hell yeah, cats are cute, but you're using a PINK marker! Do you realize what that color can do to a boy's masculinity!?!? We're developing psychological aspects in this fragile stage and you're going to mar my perfect boyhood with that color!? It so clashes with the blue hue of my hair!!!" "But I like pink!" "No!!! You like green! GREEN!!!" Killua sat up and held his friend, lamenting over senseless things. Leorio caught various phrases like "my best friend" and "too much feminine side from your aunt and grandmother". Gon, blinking and knowing nothing of what Killua was trying to say, immediately perked up as if a sudden memory just sparked inside him. "Hey! It's Kurapika's interview today, right?" he asked the doctor by the door, who was still standing wordlessly since he came. "Are you sure you won't watch with us, Leorio? Can't you get a break?" "Eh, you know how adults run their lives. Work has to come first," said Killua, who has now recovered from his ranting. He let Gon go and went beneath the covers to extract the remote control so he could turn on the TV. "Oh well, their loss." While Killua was busy, Gon blinks and suddenly looks down at the cast around Killua's left forearm. A wide grin came on his face. Marker in hand, he crept closer... * * * * * "Good evening!" From a random home in the city, the TV is tuned in on Exclusive Interviews by Shuuichi Minamino. But despite the title, it wasn't the face of Shuuichi Minamino that greeted the audience. Instead, an unfamiliar face (unfamiliar to non-YYH viewers anyway) graced the screen; a good-looking young man with dark brown hair and eyes of glistening gold. Koenma Daioh nodded, as if sensing his unseen audience's questions. "For tonight's episode, I, Koenma Daioh, shall be your host. But don't panic, for Kurama would still be with us, but he shall be posing as an assistant host and also a special 'guest'. He is said to be the counterpart of our interviewee for tonight. For our loyal audience, the concept of counterparts need not be explained further. Now, to go on, please welcome, Mr. Kurapika!" The camera shifted to - strangely - a hospital bed, occupied with a blonde teen. He was staring suspiciously at Koenma for some reason. "Wait a second," he started, turning his head towards Kurama. "Are you telling me that this guy here is the same noisy brat I saw last time? You know, the little kid on the director's seat?" A small vein visibly twitched from the side of Koenma's head. "Is it so strange to you, Kurapika-san?" asked Kurama. The blonde boy continued to stare at Koenma's mature form. "It's a surprise, that's all. I thought he was the director's son or something. I mean, he was kind of temperamental for a child--" "What the hell do you mean by that!? Who in here almost ended up behind bars for hurting countless civilians anyway?" asked the prince, his temper quickly rising. He never really liked being criticized, especially by a kid. "I demand you take that statement back!" "Oh, never mind, Kurama-san. The question concerning noisy brats has already been answered," said the blonde, fully ignoring the Reikai prince. Koenma was glaring. "You're going to die a slow, painful death someday, child." "I think we should just go on with the interview," Kurama said, cutting off further words from his co-host. "Kurapika-san, I ask of you to please be a little patient. We know that this is not the right time for your interview right now--" "Damn right, so what the hell are you doing here?" A brow twitched, but nothing more. "--but since we're told that you're pretty much capable of speaking, we thought it best to go with the schedule," explained Kurama, wisely choosing to ignore the other's snappy remark. From his side of the bed, Koenma was mentally calculating the reasons why this annoying kid on the bed didn't pass as Hiei's counterpart. The whole temper issue is definitely obvious. "Okay, Koenma-sama, I think it's your turn to speak now?" Koenma nodded, but not without casting a final glare at his interviewee first. "Right, Kurapika-san," he drawled, but paused for a moment to quirk a sarcastic brow at his cue card. But not able to think of anything else to replace the question, he asked anyway. "We've heard of the last accident you, Gon and Killua have been in. How are you feeling? And would it be all right for you to spare a bit of details on what happened?" Without missing a beat, Kurapika spoke. "Momentary insanity," he said, glaring at the camera. "When it comes to friends, Gon never thinks." "And when it comes to friendly teases, you're not a very good sport," added Koenma, thinking of the fact that it was Kurapika himself who threw Gon's friend off the building anyway. He quickly jumped up in surprise when he felt something kick his ankle below the bed. The prince looked up to glare at his co-host, who was conveniently feigning innocence as he kept his gaze at their interviewee. As if on cue, Kurapika's glare was dead set on him. "But that is one of Gon-kun's most appealing characteristics, is it not?" asked Kurama to save Koenma's neck. He was still highly fond of the dark-haired boy, and his smile was still intact as if he didn't just kick the Prince of Death on the sheens. "I guess...I suppose you can say that," mumbled Kurapika, trying his best to stop glaring at the bratty Reikai prince. "Anyway, Gon and Killua are on the other room right across this one. They wanted to be roommates." Koenma, also trying his best to not pounce on the just as bratty Kuruta, went on doing his job. "Gon and Killua seem to be very close. There are four of you in the group, and obviously eliminated from the pair are you and Leorio-san. This very same question has been given to Leorio-san, but we would also like to hear your side. So, what is your relationship with the doctor?" he asked. "We're friends," was Kurapika's deadpan answer. "What about the sticky exchanges you two get into in certain episodes? And not to mention ending songs?" persisted the Reikai prince. The Kuruta's eyes flashed furious red. "What sticky exchanges!?" "Well, I mean, Kurama and Hiei are really close friends but you don't see them doing what you and Leorio do..." "What the hell are you talking about!?" Kurama promptly stood up to hold the boy down the bed, so Kurapika had no other choice but to take a deep breath to calm himself down. "Leorio and I are friends. Normally I wouldn't admit this, but just so people would get off our case and stop being delusional perverts, I'd like to properly say that I consider Leorio as one of the very few people I've been close to ever since a bunch of lunatics attacked my race. He is completely trustworthy - again, I'll regret saying this someday - and understands things not everybody can. Somehow, we share the same memories and our stories go on the same line, so we can relate with each other. One would find comfort in knowing that there is someone who can understand his own feelings, and the comfort comes from that." Koenma nodded hesitantly, a thought still bothering his mind. "Ookay," he said, tapping his cheek with his cue cards. "Isn't that also the basis of the LeoPika fans? You know, for romance?" Kurapika's brow twitched, but he chose to keep his calm. After all, his nurse told him to keep movements to a minimum, so punching the rude prince may not be a very good idea. It was a very tempting notion though. "I don't know, but to me it only borders on friendship. Actually, I endured a 30-minute lecture with Killua regarding these questions. He said that I shouldn't say anything about it. Unless you'd want to hear a creative collection of curses, I think I'll just follow his advice," he said wearily. "Anou, unfortunately," mumbled Kurama, giving Kurapika an uneasy smile. "Kurapika-san is undeniably one of the top most popular characters in Hunter X Hunter, if not the most popular at all. So Kurapika-san, if you won't mind it very much, we have a list here of the characters that are paired with you." "Oh. I would mind, but perhaps not very much," came the Kuruta's sarcastic answer. He wasn't usually this hot-tempered, but physical pain inflicted by bodily wounds and a fever caused by the body's trying to heal itself, some could say that it was inevitable. But that was as close as a 'yes' as they had, so the two hosts went on. From his side, Koenma took a piece of paper from a pocket inside his coat and read from it. "Okay, so we're done with Leorio. Any last words for it?" Kurapika faced the camera. "Leorio and I are friends and to those who want something more from us, you can drop dead and go to hell." Kurama, partially getting used to the younger man's temper, tried to stifle a snicker. He gestured for Koenma to go on. "Okay. How about Killua?" asked the prince. "Killua may be a bit of a bratty pervert sometimes, but no, he doesn't go farther than TV materials. Besides, I consider him as a brother. He is a good friend and I suppose we are close, but only a seriously perverted mind would see more than mere friendship. Besides, he's much closer to Gon, and we barely even talk. Has anybody noticed that at all!? What the hell is up with you people!?!?" Koenma sweatdropped. "Ookay. How about Neon Nostrard?" Kurapika frowned and had to think of his answer for a while. "I'm not saying that she's bad," he started slowly. "But I never really looked at her that way. Sure she's good-looking, but I'm sorry to say but Neon-san is just a bit...well, she loves to talk. And she loves to do things I never really can relate to, like shopping, talking, etc. We're nothing alike. Plus she, uh...loves to talk. I'm not very patient and she really loves to talk." Kurama nodded, fully knowing how it was to be with extremely perky girls. But he chose to keep his silence because a huge chunk of his fans were perky girls. He couldn't afford to lose them lest he suffers the eyes of his co-characters. After all, they would always tell him that he does a lot about keeping the fan girls loyal. "Aside from that, I guess Neon-san isn't very bad. I'm just not interested I guess. I'm quite happy where I am right now," said the Kuruta, calming down for the first time, or so it seems. "With Leorio," said Koenma with a slight smirk. Kurapika just glared at him. From his side, Kurama was glaring as well. "Ri-ight," said Koenma, checking back on his list again to avoid being roasted on the spot with two people glaring at him. He hesitated asking about this next one, but after all, it was part of the job. "Another one of the more popular ones is...Kuroro, the leader of--" But before Koenma could go on, there was a loud snapping sound from the bed, and without warning, a very furious red flashed in front of the demi-god's eyes. "WHAT DOES HE HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING!?!?" bellowed Kurapika, losing his cool yet again. Had it not been for the cast on the Kuruta's arm, Koenma could've sworn that he'd have claws around his neck by then. "Nothing!" said a voice from behind Kurapika, and promptly, a pair of hands came up to grab the young man by the arms to settle him back down on the bed. "The name 'Kuroro' must've found its way on the list, but I assure you that it isn't intentional," said Kurama. He then gave his co-host The Look. Koenma, desperately needing his aspirin, dropped his head for a second before continuing. "Okay!" he announced, going back to the list. "I suppose we should scratch the whole of Geneiryodan now." "WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY DOING THERE TO BEGIN WITH!?!?!?!?!" "Yes, definitely scratching Machi, Shizuku, Hisoka--" "HISOKA!?" "Yes, well, you did work together some time ago, didn't you? And after all, during the exam, you two were--well, what are you anyway? You get paired up with boys and girls and some of them are not even yaoi. The truth, kid, are you a man or not?" "Do I need to take my top off for you people again!? I already did that, what the hell is your damage!? And Hisoka! Can we go back to that? Why would anyone pair me up with that guy!?" "Apart from the fact that you can be paired up with absolutely anyone in and out of the show, Hisoka-san is also quite popular." "Hisoka? Hisoka!? Are we even talking about the same Hisoka here??" "Well, the list says that--" "I think that's enough," said Kurama, snatching the list away from Koenma. But unfortunately, he was too late, and the Kuruta's eyes were flashing dangerously red, his free hand clawed menacingly in front of the Reikai prince's throat. Heaving a defeated sigh, the red-haired young man stood up and pressed the button connecting them to the nurse's counter. * * * * * "He-ey!" whined a pouting Killua as he now stared at a blank TV screen. "It was just getting good!" Gon, who was sitting up on the bed right beside Killua's, also blinked up at the blank screen. They were just watching Kurapika's interview when all of a sudden, just when Kurapika was about to attack the director and temporary host, they were presented yet again with a blank screen. Like the one from Killua's interview. "I think they should just shift the show from being live to something scheduled. I mean, they can't keep doing this, right Killua?" There was an awful amount of ruckus from the room across from theirs. Killua grinned. "Oh no, Gon! Don't even go there! I like this show as is!" he said, grinning from ear to ear. "Yes, but--" Gon remembered the look on Kurapika's eyes. That was his...well, Killua and Leorio dubbed it as the 'DIE' look. And for a good reason, too. "What if he accidentally kills the Prince of Reikai?" he asked worriedly. He didn't want Kurapika to kill. It took his all - and a bunch of devices Leorio placed on him to keep him and Killua in place, he wondered if it was because of the riot they caused a while ago - to not get up and save Kurapika from himself. Killua sighed and reached out towards Gon, seeing the look in his eyes. "Don't worry," he said, petting his best friend's shoulder. "There won't be any accidents when it comes to Kurapika. He has a mind of his own," he said. But just when Gon was about to reply, Killua broke into a grin again. "If he kills that prince, he knows exactly what he's doing." He was just about to snicker at his own joke, but that was before he tilted his head to look at his arm. There, in a perfectly straight row, were five little pink piglets drawn on his cemented cast. Gon saw the look and brightened up. "Oh! You didn't want the cats, so I decided to just use piglets. Do you like it?" he asked innocently. "See, it's like this. This little piggy went to market...and this little piggy went to the zoo..." Killua paled. "Noooo!!! Gon, I'm going to kill you!!!" * * * * * "Sensei," called the nurse behind the desk. Leorio looked up from what he was doing to regard her politely. The young lady continued. "Room 517 asked for a mild tranquilizer. Which one do you think would be appropriate?" she asked. "Exactly how mild?" the doctor asked, his eyes skimming through the clipboard he was holding, signing what he was supposed to sign. "Strong enough to calm the patient down but not strong enough to make him go to sleep instantly. I think they're having an interview there. Do you think we should stop it? I mean, I know it's just a broken arm, but the patient needs rest and--" It dawned on him immediately. Leorio sighed. Kurapika. He should've known. "Don't worry," he said, handing the nurse the clipboard. "I'll take care of it." "Oh. And sensei. One of the nurses said that Room 516 was getting noisy. Perhaps you should go check on the patients as well." 516? An image of two kids burning a whole box of matches under their covers - or other activities close to that insanity - came to his mind. Great. "No need," said the doctor with a wary sigh. "Just give me another set of tranquilizers." * * * * * Hisoka scowled at the blank screen, but not for the same reasons as most people's. He turned to the young man beside him - for some reason, he and Illumi became avid fans of this stupid show. But oh well. Back to the question at hand. "That brat!" he said, folding his arms. Illumi regarded him with nothing more than a small quirk of a brow, but Illumi being Illumi, that was the best expression anyone can get from him. Hisoka continued. "I mean, so what if we're paired together sometimes? I mean, it's not like I was the traitor between the two of us," he whined, using the spare time to vent out his frustrations. "I mean, I'm not that bad. I'm good-looking enough. You find me attractive, don't you, Illumi?" A weird pause. Illumi gave the magician a strange look. "Hisoka, please tell me that you don't expect me to answer that," he said, mildly disturbed by Hisoka's question. Hisoka pouted. "But--" "Welcome back, everyone!" "The show's back." "But Illumi~!" "Shut up, Hisoka." "But--!!!" "Look." The assassin faced the other. "You don't have a girlfriend. Does that mean anything to you?" The magician merely blinked. "But I thought you said that I don't have any girlfriends because I tend to scare half of the world population with my sadistic tendencies and drive the other half insane?" he answered defensively. Illumi rolled his eyes. "Hisoka, the show's on. Please let it go." "Hm...so, if half and half makes a whole, which side are you on?" "...Is that what you call a decent question?" Another pout. "Fine," sulked the magician, scooting away from the assassin, settling himself on the far end of the couch. "Don't speak to me unless you stop being such a jerk. And unless you admit that I'm attractive," he said, stubbornly turning his head away but not before he stuck an indignant tongue out at the assassin. Again, Illumi just had to roll his eyes. * * * * * "And...we're back," announced Koenma, his face dominating the screen again. "We sincerely apologize for yet another cut on our show. Because of circumstances beyond our control, me and my co-host decided to allow a special guest in on the show to accompany us until our last segment." The screen momentarily flashed towards Leorio, who was currently sitting on a chair on the opposite side of the room. "Yo," he greeted, lifting up a hand for a simple wave. The camera shifted back on the other side of the room. Kurapika was now heaving deep breathes of air, one slender hand's fingers holding up a ball of cotton on his bare arm. "Stupid tranquilizer. If I was asked, this bratty prince needs it more than I do," he mumbled to himself. Kurama gave him a sympathetic look. "And now, we're on to our last segment," continued Koenma. "This is probably what you've all been waiting for. We have time for but a few questions with us, but we hope it would suffice." He then turned to Kurama and Kurapika. "First question: How does it feel like being the best loved characters in your own respective shows?" Kurama gestured towards Kurapika, telling him to speak first. "Well," said Kurapika, unsure for the first time on what he's supposed to say. "I suppose it's not so bad. But I swear, Killua would do better with the fans bit. I mean, not that I dislike anybody--" A snort came from the other end of the room. Leorio immediately looked away, looking innocent, earning himself a glare from the Kuruta. But he continued anyway. "--But I'm just not up for this popularity thing. I value my privacy and...well, you just don't get much of it when you're being jumped half the time. I mean, you saw what happened during Leorio's interview." Koenma nodded. He then turned to Kurama. "Well, I'm kind of comfortable with people, so it's really not that bad," said Kurama, casting the young Kuruta a smile. "I mean, one would get used to it eventually. You've got to admit, the fans tend to flatter. In a way, one would feel honored nonetheless. Sure there's the hassle, but if one can tolerate it, it's all right." "Second question: Do you have a special someone right now?" Immediately, Koenma grimaced at that question. "Who the hell makes these things!?" Kurama sweatdropped. "Isn't it funny that we don't know, Koenma?" he asked, letting out a sheepish laugh. "Anyway, my answer for that is no. I don't have a special someone if we're speaking romantically. My mother is still the most important person to me," he said, smiling brightly. Koenma can almost hear viewers miles around cheer in joy. Or maybe it was the nurses at the floor counters that he heard? "Anou, I don't have one either," said Kurapika. Did he say cheer? Koenma thought he felt a violent earthquake for a second there. Simultaneous fans jumping for joy, he supposed... "I don't have enough time with me and I don't think I'm up for a commitment. Like I said, my privacy means a lot to me, and I don't think I'm up for sharing my life with anybody special just yet," continued the young Kuruta. "Oh?" asked Koenma. He couldn't help but shift a sidelong glance at the doctor behind the cameraman. Unfortunately, Leorio saw the look. He frowned almost immediately. "Wha-at??" he asked, looking over his shoulder to check if Koenma's looking someplace else. All that there was there was but the white, blank wall. Kurapika saw the look as well. Needless to say, he was glaring daggers at Koenma yet again. "Start on that again and I'll be sure to royally throw you off the building, your majesty," he drawled with a tinge of sadistic sarcasm. "I didn't say anything!" defended Koenma, and he quickly shot back down at his cards again. "This'll be our last question. What's...your favorite color??" he stopped, gawking at the card he was holding. He snapped. "Who's the moron who comes up with these questions anyway!?!? This is an interview, not an autograph book!" Kurapika sweatdropped. "Uh...I never really thought about it. I'll go for red I suppose, in memory of my clan," he said. "Cute! I pick red too! It's so good for hair color," said Kurama cheerfully, patting Kurapika's back. He then cast his co-host a look and saw him eating up his cue cards for some strange reason. He was muttering to himself, something about 'stupid fan girls'. Kurama just dismissed it, seeing that they were out of time. "That's all we have for tonight, everyone! I would like to thank my co-host and director, Koenma-sama," he said. Koenma was stomping on the cue cards now. "And also, to Kurapika-san of lending us his time even in such a predicament." "Yare yare..." dismissed Kurapika, waving his hand frantically. He seemed to be shuddering in his bed. "I mean, you blackmailed me into it anyway. Now can you please take that spider from under my bed and throw it out somewhere before I kill it myself?" "Kurapika's sick and you're placing a spider under his bed!?" came Leorio's defense, his doctor and best friend's instincts coming up. Kurama sweatdropped. "It was Koenma's idea," he said, pointing at the prince. "Yeah, but who got the spider?" defended the prince. He then cast a sly look on the doctor. "Is that a hint of concern I hear from your voice, sensei?" "Quit it with those perverted cracks, you poor-excuse-for-a-god-of-Death!" cried both Leorio and Kurapika simultaneously. Kurama watched the three with weary eyes and just cast a sheepish smile at the camera. "That's all we have for tonight, everyone. Take care, and be sure to tune in for the next episode. For our next interviewee, we have Hisoka, the mysterious magician whose stand never really was too clear." Somewhere in the background, Kurama could've sworn he heard somebody cry out a "No, not that creepy guy!", but with all the commotion, he wasn't sure. So instead, he just continued to smile and bade the viewers goodbye. "That's it, good night to you all!" * * * * * From another end of the city, a pale hand reached out to turn the TV off. Illumi sighed, flipping his hair back impatiently before facing the other man beside him. "Oh for cryin' out loud, Hisoka. You can't stay angry with me forever. You'd talk to me eventually." "No, I won't." "Yes, you would. You're too talkative and you have no one else to talk to." "I am not talkative! And besides, I'll just play with my cards than talk to you." Illumi sweatdropped. "You just did, stupid. Twice." The assassin could've sworn he saw Hisoka flinch. This notion was confirmed when Hisoka just slapped his hand on his forehead, frustrated that he was tricked. He gave the assassin a menacing glare. "Well, it won't happen again," he said. "You're talking to me now," Illumi pointed out. "Am not!" Hisoka turned away and covered his ears. For the third time that night, Illumi had to roll his eyes. End of Episode 4 Whoa, got pretty long. Ehe...oh let me off, it's not like wasting people's time with crap that was too long to undergo an extensive beta-reading is considered a mortal sin or anything...*gets hit with a thrown dictionary*
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